What Should We Do? How Shall We Die?
The recent spate of accusations of priestly sexual abuse and the concomitant reports of episcopal negligence have caused deep pain to many inside and outside the Church. As a faithful Catholic I am deeply ashamed. As someone whose family life has been impacted by such abuse (the priest who baptized me had serially abused a family member years earlier), I am offended when some in the Church perpetuate the victimization through a crass and irresponsible defensiveness. All the bad journalism in the world does not make the Pope a victim in any sense remotely comparable to those who suffered at the hands of abusive priests and litigious dioceses.
As each day brings a new devastating headline, I feel quite helpless. One day, early on in the current crisis, it struck me that the only thing I had experienced that gave me the same feeling was during a juvenile game my friends put me through at my bachelor party. At the end of a fun afternoon of paintball, I discovered they had a special game planned just for me. They had provided a costume and set up an obstacle course. Donning the costume, I would have to complete the obstacle course as quickly as possible while being shot at by at least a dozen snipers. As I sprinted out from the starting gate paint balls whizzed past me, but soon they snipers found their angle and the hits began. I only remember the first one. It was impossible to count them, but they hurt like hell (my costume didn’t offer much protection). In the middle of the course I was high on a platform and had to untie a flag from a tree branch. As I stood still, I was an easy target. The hits kept coming. I couldn’t take it anymore. I dove behind the platform and hid. The guns stopped firing. After a moment someone asked if I was alright. I managed to say “No!” From behind the platform I could see the finish line. I knew going out again would be intensely painful, but at the finish line it would stop.
To me, each new news report feels like another shot. I have lost count of them. I am standing, vulnerable, waiting for the next one. I don’t know when it will end. The pain is intense but I have no option except to take it.
The Church must fight the temptation to duck and cover. There will be no resurrection if we do not see this right to the end. Something has to die here. My question is, “What does our death look like?”
In my reading, especially over at the America blog, I have come across some interesting proposals. Here are some initial ideas that have come up in my reading and my thinking on the topic. I wonder what Vox Nova readers think of these ideas and what other proposals might be out there. We have to do something.
1. The Pope should call an extraordinary Synod of Bishops to deal with the crisis ASAP.
2. The Church and the secular media need to establish a better working relationship. For all their flaws, the media is not the enemy. We owe them a great debt. How can the Church get over its instinct to kill the messenger? How can the media be helped to better understand and represent the Church?
3. Every bishop in the world needs to meet regularly with victims and their advocates.
4. The next “Year of . . . ” that comes out of Rome should be a year of prayer and fasting for this evil. Failing that, we should all start praying and fasting anyway.
5. Fire Bill Donahue.
What other concrete proposals have you heard? Do you have any to make yourself? What are the strengths and weaknesses of these proposals?
Brett Salkeld is a doctoral student in theology at Regis College in Toronto. He is a father of two (so far) and husband of one.
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The only thing I don’t understand is, why if the priest are caught doing something that wrong, are they still allowed to be priests? Why is Cardinal Law still inside the Vatican? Couldnt that be corrected?
I have questions I wish someone would answer, and thoughts to share. But for the moment I just want to thank you for writing what you have written. There is such a tiny amount of understanding and honesty, on this topic, right now. It seems to me you are brave, in an inner way and in the world too. I am so very grateful.
Brett, I too feel the passion of many feelings associated with the inept response of our church leaders. It was only through the miracle of God’s Grace that I returned to our faith Easter of ’05 after a 40 year absence which was the result of experiencing as a child the lack of love in those who were responsible for teaching me the faith. I was not abused but I now know that a child has the sensitivity to identify whether or not love is present. It was not then and it does not seem to be present now in the neurotypical extroverts who tend to be those who are best at manipulation and competition in social situations.
The face of the Church today is ugly. It lacks love and it reacts with the primitive passionate survival instincts that have not been nurtured with the transforming Love of God which is necessary to bring about a passionate maturity of faith which then opens the human being to the wisdom of the Holy Spirit who brings us Light and Life.
The current situation reveals the extent to which the Church has evolved in its understanding of God’s Love and how she lives it especially in these revelations.
What should the leaders do? Cloe Madanes who has been an expert in treating adolescent offenders since she obtained a federal grant sometime in the early ’80′s after imigrating from, I think Argentina, gives us a great start to the process.
The offender gets on his knees before the victim and the victim’s family. He stays on his knees and moves before each member of the group and states what he has done to harm each of them. The victim will then determine whether or not she/he thinks that the perp has been sincere. If there is not sincerity the process is repeated until sincerity is experienced.
Next the parents of the victim are on their knees in front of the victim to express their failure in protecting her/him and what they have learned through the victim’s suffering that will enable them to be better parents and protectors.
This is the first step for the leaders and it must be a public demonstration for all to see. They and we must die to ourselves and give up everything in order to follow Him.
I think the fourth suggestion is a very good one – the foundational remedy, if you will. With that in place, I think the other steps will could work and will be effective.
Brett, this isn’t the Year OF the Priest, celebrating them or encouraging vocations to the priesthood. It’s the Year FOR Priests. It’s about how badly the priests are falling short of their vocations. The sexual abuse is part of it.
“There are also, sad to say, situations which can never be sufficiently deplored where the Church herself suffers as a consequence of infidelity on the part of some of her ministers. Then it is the world which finds grounds for scandal and rejection. What is most helpful to the Church in such cases is not only a frank and complete acknowledgment of the weaknesses of her ministers, but also a joyful and renewed realization of the greatness of God’s gift, embodied in the splendid example of generous pastors, religious afire with love for God and for souls, and insightful, patient spiritual guides.”
Do you think a synod of bishops, so many appointed by John Paul II, would have a reaction any different from what we’re getting now?
The Good Friday service at the Vatican, the church is the victim:
VATICAN CITY — Pope Benedict XVI’s personal preacher on Friday likened accusations against the pope and the Catholic church in the sex abuse scandal to “collective violence” suffered by the Jews.
The Rev. Raniero Cantalamessa said in a Good Friday homily with the pope listening in St. Peter’s Basilica that a Jewish friend wrote to him to say the accusations remind him of the “more shameful aspects of anti-Semitism.”
Also, no credible accusation should ever be fought in court again. Ever. This needs to be enforced from the highest levels.
Statute of limitations, schmatute of limitations.
Benedict and his supporters are delusional.
Brett,
Your comment “no credible accusation should ever be fought in court” is exactly the line along which I have been thinking.
We all know “defenses” that could be made, that lawyers are used to making and we are all used to hearing. But the Church should not be like other defendants. You say “Ever.” I would say, certainly not in our lifetimes.
Think how deeply it would resonate, if the Church announced: “We will make no further defense. These crimes are not defensible. We will turn all the evidence we have over to local authorities. We will not negotiate, but simply plead guilty as charged. We will accept whatever penalty follows.”
Yes it is true, there is anti-Catholicism in the world, and there are Catholics against the Pope. Yes, some people are probably leaking memos to the press, intending to harm the Church or the Pope or both. Yes there is child abuse in other places. Yes the Pope probably has legal immunity from subpoena powers. Yes some of these bishops did not work under secular laws requiring reporting abuse to police, at the time. It may be that the officials who transferred these priests from parish to parish did not actually sign written orders explaining what they were doing.
It is even true, that much of the criticism is unfair. With these kind of crimes, against these victims, in these numbers- the world will not be overly concerned with “fairness.” Eventually, when the truth has been published, and criminals punished, some balance may return. It will not be given, right now, it has to be earned.
A very respected person I know, involved in reaching out as a therapist to the many abused who came forward in Los Angeles for such help, concluded that the overwhelming majority of such persons were credible. I accept her conclusion as true.
Even so, as for “credible accusations” not being taken to court, allow me to point out that priests are citizens of these United States, innocent until proven guilty beyond a reasonable doubt. Those who are guilty of a crime should be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law. The innocent, and falsely accused, and there have been some, also deserve their day in court to prove their innocence, since “credible” is in the eye of the beholder. So with apologies, I cannot agree. Due process should be followed.
Father Patrick,
I have no problem with due process. If the accused is maintaining his innocence, it should go to court.
My issue is with the legal games that go on long after everyone knows the accused is guilty. Once that has been established, either through personal admission or through due process, then we just say sorry and accept judgment.
Hopefully that is clearer. Thanks for your comment.
Pinky;
The problem I see with the quote you supplied (esp. “…the Church herself suffers as a consequence of infidelity on the part of some of her ministers.”) is that it still claims that the church as an institution is the victim. The pope is the one being crucified. And the children who were abused? They are conveniently disappeared.
What is clear to me is the lack of wisdom in the Vatican beginning with the Pope. This travesty clearly exhibits the limitation of logic as a foundation of faith especially when logic is used to create a delusional belief system which identifies the secular media as the enemy and equates the pope with the Crucifixion and anitsemitism.
The enemy is not out there it is inside the Church. It is fear of intimacy, fear of passion, fear of vulnerability, fear of what is in one’s mind and this is the foundation of the theology which is the basis of the catechism and the split from awareness in which love and fear co-exist in the document that supports the repressed rage and hatred of those who project these feelings on to a fabricated enemy who threatens the rigidity of their psychotic narcissistic identity.
Now, I must say that I am sorry for my anger but more than anything else I am sorry for the real victims, the children, and, everyone who has been violated and repulsed by this mutated expression of what used to be the beautiful faith that God brought into my heart.
I believe I can understand the concerns expressed by the idea of Due Process.
The difficulty. respectfully, is that Due Process seems to be what we have had. And where is it taking us? I just ask you to think about it.
NO not all the bad journalism in the world makes up for it. But is it ok to criticize a very misleading report the NYT did. I think that is fine. If people want the problem fixed if people want to get to the root of the problem then misleading statements from the Church or the press will not help. Period.
I do not care about the accuracy of the NY Times reports. I care about the reaction of the Church leaders and what is revealed in their reactions. The NYT report is the spark that reveals what is in the hearts of those who claim the fullness of the truth to be present in our faith. The NYT is the spark which is used to show us the darkness which inhabits and pollutes the truth into an expression of hardness and condemnation until it no longer is the truth of God which attracts, rather, it mutates into a rigidity of criticism and self-righteous indignation creating a relationship of mutual disgust between the religious and the secular.
The NYT reveals what needs healing and love in us before we can even hope to begin to spread the gospel of life.
Right now we are being shown that we as Catholics are dwelling in the gospel of death and that we are co-creators of that culture of death which we so passionately despise and express through our participation under the tent of pro-life.
You want to save the Catholic and Apostolic Faith, right? Well, so do I because, for one thing, I think there must be a philosophically coherent alternative to “modernism,” but, at this point, I believe that only one thing will save it from what this guy is predicting:
http://www.newser.com/off-the-grid/post/434/i-just-cant-stop-dwelling-on-the-catholics.html
…the resignation of Benedict and the purging of the entire episcopal hierarchy of ALL who colluded in the perpetration or the cover-up of this abuse.
Unfortunately the message is loud and clear –
we really do not care what you people in the pews might think – the institution is bigger and more important than your short lived worldly concerns.
This Easter official Rome has all but has given us the finger – frankly they are doing that sort of thing for quite a while – the Williamson affair for example comes to mind. In essence they say we can do without you heavily secularized Catholics that give us always trouble – we will rather focus on our pious orthodox core constituency – folks that actually appreciate us Priests properly. I read the “400.000 Priests are behind you Holy Father” in that light – circle the wagons -curious that they did not even bother mentioning the concern of the average Catholics – again it seems all about preserving a way of life for our Priests.
Thanks a lot.
Gosh, reading this post almost makes me feel guilty about the bachelor party. But then I remember how funny it was, and I quickly forget any concern I have for your psychological well being.
In ideal world, taking a stand that such cases will not be brought to court would perhaps be the greatest witness. However, there is an unfortunate material reality that needs to be taken into account. If the Church did not defend itself in a civil case, the damages awarded to the victim would likely be astronomical, and would more likely than not bankrupt the diocese. Is it fair and just that the Church would abandon their stewardship to the rest of their flock to make a public statement? Do they not have a moral responsibility to try and act as rightful stewards of the resources of the faithful?
I am no lawyer, but I’d like to know some more details about what the diocese of Antigonish did. It seems to me that that could be a helpful model for moving forward. Anyone know some details?
And, though the Church needs to be careful about bankrupting itself, the fact that we are not in an ideal world does mean that the rest of us are going to need to pony up. I’d rather my money go to abuse victims than lawyers paid to fight them.
With the NYPD, it’s the “blue wall of silence”, with the Catholic church it’s purple/scarlet. It’s typical of organizations to behave in such manner. In addition, take into account the ‘benefit of the clergy’ – centuries of immunity from secular justice, the mindset doesnt just vanish. Another factor is that hierarchs have no (official) children – sympathizing with another cleric may come more easily. Lastly, priesthood as “hideout” for Self-loathing, psychosexually immature homosexual men is the special Catholic twist. Most offenders abused males in puberty, pedophilia was a much smaller percentage than ephebophilia. The high percentage of gay men in the Catholic priesthood paired with the condemnation ofmhomosexuality, access to children as an authority figure viewed as somewhat supernatural – that’s the perfect storm.
Hi Brett. I have been enjoying your posts but you have forced me to reconsider my desire to go paint balling.
Gerald, in the 60 to the early 90s homosexuality was not condemned but celebrated within some priest cliques in the US. The book “Good Bye Good Men” is depressing summary of this dark period in the church. Father Raymond de Souza also touches on the period in this article and adds some commentary about the current sexual abuse problems in the church.
I’ve spoken to people who think every other priest is a child abuser so I have sympathy to those who try to give some proportionality to the abuse in the church. Did the Bill Donahue article require three quarters of it to apologize and attack the abusers before providing proportionality? Is it okay for most people to think priests are higher per capita abusers of teens and kids? At what point should we as Catholics address that perception if ever?
Here is the Raymond de Souza article:
http://www.nationalpost.com/opinion/columnists/story.html?id=a9a4cd05-0934-4b32-a3f8-2ba97da935b3&p=1
Brett, how do you make one of those fancy highlighted one word links to a website?
P-dogg
Do the following, except instead of using curly braces — that is { and } — use angle brackets (“less than” and “greater than” signs, if you are a mathematician).
Here is the Raymond de Souza {a href=”http://www.nationalpost.com/opinion/columnists/story.html?id=a9a4cd05-0934-4b32-a3f8-2ba97da935b3&p=1″}article{/a}.
Substituting angle brackets, it comes out like this:
Here is the Raymond de Souza article.
Paul,
I’ve read a lot of things that have been able to point out some of the media’s missteps without going into the kind of angry counter-accusations that Donahue engages in. John Allen Jr. and James Martin S.J. come to mind. The de Souza article also doesn’t spend any time singing, “Nanana poopoo” because others have made the same mistakes.
In short, it is one thing to point out a few basic facts about priestly abuse stats. It is another to spend all one’s time complaining about unfair treatment at the hands of the “liberal” media. People have very little sympathy for child-abusers and their cover men. We’ll get no mileage out of “No fair! No fair!” If we can calmly point out things (like de Souza’s point that there were only 6 alleged acts of sex abuse last year in the US) the reader will get the point without being set on the defensive.
As for hyperlinks, I have no idea how one could do it without access to Vox Nova’s backroom. That’s where I do mine. Heck, I can’t even do italics out here. ;)
[Oh! Now I see David's advice. Thanks David.]
I guess for me the biggest thing is that any fact correcting should never give the impression that the Church is somehow a victim in any sense comparable to those who were abused. When a piece indicates the author is more concerned about the Church’s reputation than raped children my alarm goes off. It is that attitude that got us into this mess. For me, and for the vast majority, Donahue gives that impression.
Benedict “hoisted on his own canards”:
http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/the_daily_dish/2010/04/an-administrative-nightmare.html