Curmudgeonly Rant
I’m not sure I can officially say we didn’t celebrate Mother’s Day this year, but we didn’t do anything for it either. This is getting to be a more common occurrence at our household. This past Christmas was the least enjoyable for me, at least since childhood. I’m to the point where I would like to stay home (rather than travel) and go to mass on Christmas Day at my parish. If any family are in town, we can celebrate together, but otherwise we’ll celebrate as a family and possibly with some friends whose extended families are also far away.
The thing about getting older is that you stop caring so much about what other people think. Being a curmudgeon, one can say, “If you like it, enjoy it, but I don’t, so forget about it.” If you like Sweetest Day and Grandparents Day, more power to you. But all I really need is a hug on Father’s Day, and I’ll even take those gladly on every other day. I don’t need my special day, in any of my various roles.
And while I’m being curmudgeonly, I’ll speak out against adult activities. No I’m not talking about what occurs behind darkened windows. I’m considering the myriad of things in life that are segregated by age group. We have teenage dances, adult Bible studies, men’s groups, women’s groups, yout’ groups, etc. Heaven forbid that age groups should intermix. While certainly not perfect, bars were a lot better when children were bellying up. And you don’t see teenagers bumping and grinding on the dance floors at weddings, but you sure see it when they are segregated. And in religious education, you may not find the 16-year-old confirmees edifying to 12-year-old first communion kids or the 6-year-olds with wide-eyed wonder, but perhaps by intermixing them the youngin’s might learn some real things and the 16-year-olds might be pressed into a deeper expression of faith, even if not a perfect one.
Update: A reader kindly emailed that her parish and others have used the F.IR.E. (Family-centered Intergenerational Religious Education) Program that groups people intergenerationally. Thanks for the suggestion.
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And you don’t see teenagers bumping and grinding on the dance floors at weddings, but you sure see it when they are segregated.
You must go to better weddings than I have. I’ve seen some of that…though then again I can’t remember if I saw teens do it or only adults.
Not kidding, unfortunately.
I’ll second your notion. Our house isn’t big on commercialized holidays, either. I don’t need Hallmark to tell me that today is the day I should tell my wife I love her. I’d like to think giving her flowers or doing something special for her carries more import when done on my schedule, not someone else’s. We are also using the occasion of the birth of our fourth child as the basis for telling the family that for us Easter and Christmas will now be celebrated at our home. Anyone is welcome to come, but we won’t be traveling. Theoretically, this is because traveling several hours with four kids all under the age of 9 and packing gifts and clothes and all the other support gear required for a multi-day stay, etc., etc., is a burden that sucks the life out of the event. In reality it is also because we feel a need to celebrate these events not just with our extended family, but also at our own parish with our community that plays such a huge role in our lives.
“Curmudgeonly Rant(s)” are my favorite. Thanks!